10,000 Words

Posted by Cindy Conner on

Many years ago, a dear friend, who was going through a divorce, gave my husband a book on marriage.  Our friend had learned so much from the book, but it was too little too late for his marriage.  Learning from his mistakes, it was important to him that our own marriage didn't get into trouble.  It was a very good book by a notable Christian marriage counselor.  My Brent is dyslexic, so it was a true act of love that he finished the book.  I read it too and thought as I read it "oh goody I'm so glad he's reading this part!"

All he came away with however, was that women have 10,000 MORE words a day than men do.  The book had great examples of how a husband could manage this conundrum but that was all lost on my husband.  He was distracted by the fact that a woman had that many WORDS.  He couldn't get beyond it and it skewed his focus for everything else the book had to offer.

I use up all my words in a day including my 10000 extra ones. There are so many conversations in the store.  Sometimes I see the look on his face when he passes by and over-hears a snippet of conversation.  I know that look.  Years later he is still trying to process the 10000 word thing.

I might have used my words this week on some name calling. I may or may not have (playfully) called Abbie "bossy." To which she instantly advised me to recognize my employee's strengths.  Point taken.  So as I tried to write a blog about DIY this week after too much research into blogs and books, hoping to get inspired, I quickly discovered that there are lots of how to blogs out there far more qualified than I. Abbie's sage advice rang in my head: recognize strengths.

As I was getting frustrated because this blog wasn't writing itself, I had a conversation with a customer who was finding the task of decorating daunting.  As I listened to her story I came to the conclusion that she had simply not bonded with her home.  When I said this to her she completely agreed, and we discussed ideas for her to be "in like" with her home.  After-all, any relationship should start with mutual like and let the natural progression evolve into being in love.  Relationships, even those with our homes, take time.  As we talked  I found myself getting excited for her as she wrapped her head around the concept of bonding with her home.  It was then that I realized that my strength is not being a design guru but an encourager. I know how to use my words to support ideas.

That doesn't seem like much in the whole scheme of things unless you can see beneath the surface.  Our words are powerful.  Imagine every woman's extra 10000 words being used for good and how that would impact our lives and our world.

Awhile back Starbucks was running a campaign where they printed notable quotes on their cups.  In my office, taped to my lamp is the cut out of a cup I saved a long time ago.  It is a quote by Madeleine Albright who said:

There is a special place in hell for women who don't help other women.  

It all starts with the power of our words.  Somewhere in Matthew Jesus reminds us that what we say reveals what is in our hearts. 

What kind of words come from your mouth?  




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  • Hi there I’m up to date. Love your prose. Hug to ya.

    Phillip J Darnell on

  • Your words bring life and the perspective of someone enlighten and who reveals in relationships.
    Like Jesus, your words bring life and hope to any circumstance (like bonding with your home). When you speak, I listen.

    Heather Converse on

  • Wow! I love this post! Thank you for this, I needed it. I think all too often we get caught up in gossip and I think we don’t always see how awful it really is. I wonder what the world would look like if we all said one nice thing to each and every person we talk to. Just one nice thing.

    Natalie Rogers on

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